Full of Grace
by Bri
Summary: Make of it what you will. :)


full of grace  
by bri  
notes at the end.  
-----------------------  
the winter here's cold and bitter  
it's chilled us to the bone  
we haven't seen the sun for weeks  
to long too far from home  
-----------------------  
  
The snow swirling outside the window was mesmerizing, Intoxicating as any drink he had experimented with. He curled up his slender body on the windowseat, pulling a blanket snugly over himself.  
  
Everything was covered with a pure blanket of ochre; icicles played across his favorite tree, a majestic oak that embraced the swirly ice blue sky.  
  
He closed his eyes; slender, nimble fingers groped for the end of his braid. Slowly, he unbound the tie that held the strands of mahogany glory together, and shook out his long chestnut hair. It brushed against his face, warm against his skin; cradling him as no one ever had. As no one ever would.  
  
-----------------------  
I feel just like I'm sinking  
and I claw for solid ground  
I'm pulled down by the undertow  
I never thought I could feel so low  
oh darkness I feel like letting go  
-----------------------  
  
Deep violet eyes opened, the hue of wildflowers on a bright summer day as they turned back to the view outside. His reflection reminded him of a morning as unlike today as was possible; dubiously, he pulled the memory off of the shelf and dusted it off, playing it back in his mind's eye.  
  
It was a sun-kissed field dotted with trees; soft blades of grass reached up to the sky, waving their greetings as he spun wildly, his arms outstretched. He laughed, and against all logic the sound reverberated like church bells around him. There was no reason here. He cherished it so.  
  
Opening his eyes, the world poured back in one dizzy rush. He collapsed, giddy from happiness; laying there was the simplest thing in the world. And then a shadow joined him, falling back on the soft bed of grass. He turned his head slowly, his braid flopping ungracefully over one shoulder.   
  
An angel spread its wings next to him; lips parted slightly, golden eyelashes brushing the rosy cheeks. If he unfocused enough, he could almost see the other boy's untarnished halo.  
  
And with complete trust, the boy radiating light drew closer and rested his head on the dark frock of the other. Tentatively, he stroked the angel's cheek.  
  
Onyx dark and glowing light combined.  
  
He should have known it wouldn't last.  
  
-----------------------------  
if all of the strength and all of the courage  
come and lift me from this place  
I know I could love you much better than this  
full of grace, full of grace my love  
-----------------------------  
  
Beauty fled from his outstretched hand.  
  
But the other boy, the sword of light; he offered his own hand and pulled him up from the darkness. He dusted off the years of fear and crystallized tears, replacing them with wonder and joy. He gave so much of himself that it amazed the darkchild how he could remain so pure.  
  
His warm smile still lingered in his mind. And perhaps some of his work still remained; as the boy buried his face in the fine, silky strands of his hair, he knew that he was not the same. But if that was for the best... he didn't know.  
  
Instead of beauty, he gathered filaments of darkness and light, weaving them into one single glistening chain that linked him precariously to the angel. The strand couldn't last forever, but it would suffice until the angel snapped it or built a binding that was longer-lasting.  
  
He knew it was all in his mind's eye, this little fantasy that he fed and entertained until it became real. But the golden boy chuckled and added his own thoughts to the play. Before they realized what they were doing, each had the other convinced that they were meant to be together forever.  
  
-----------------------  
so it's better this way, I said  
having seen this place before  
where everything we said and did  
hurts us all the more  
it's just that we stayed, too long  
in the same old sickly skin  
I'm pulled down by the undertow  
I never thought I could feel so low  
oh darkness I feel like letting go  
------------------------  
  
Forever. The word stung his skin, peeling back his defenses as tears built up in those wildflower eyes and fought to pour down his pale cheeks. Forever and forever and forever...   
  
They couldn't heal one another. They couldn't build one another into what they were not meant to be, no matter how they labored. And so they didn't labor, simply reveled in the other's companionship.  
  
The window was an open solace from his thoughts. He tipped back his head to absorb the wonder the spunsugar clouds and patches of sapphire brought him. Sapphire... so much like the aquamarine eyes of his love... so much like the raging tides of the sea.  
  
The next memory came unbidden.  
  
------------------------------  
if all of the strength  
and all of the courage  
come and lift me from this place  
I know I could love you much better than this  
full of grace, full of grace   
------------------------------  
  
Gulls called overhead, songs chasing one another across the twilight sky. The rushing sea added its own harmony to the intricate symphony, drawing the two wanderers to the ocean.  
  
The sand was warm and thick under his feet as he dashed from place to place, trying to catch fireflies under the setting sun. The other boy stretched out on the heated ground, tracing patterns with his delicate fingers.  
  
They mused aloud of beauty, of love, and of war; if the latter should be prevented altogether or continue to thrive until the fires burned themselves out of their own accord. An argument arose, and instead of settling peacefully, the darkchild chose silence.  
  
The angel closed his eyes on the tears that threatened to fall, and instead voiced a thought on love. He pulled it from the air whirling tiny bits of sand around his golden hair.   
  
But the darkchild spun silence, eroding the thread binding the two. He spun silence against his nature; ignored his wanting to banished darkness and instead reveled in it. He spoke naught and watched the angel struggle with a decision.  
  
He unfolded his wings and flew into the twilight mist.  
  
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it's better this way  
-------------  
  
The darkchild wept.  
  
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notes  
this was originally meant as a gundam wing piece, and if you take it like that, it could be perceived as either a romance or a friendship. the darkchild is duo, the angel is quatre... that is, if you take it that way.  
  
i think this piece could work on many levels. you could decide which way to take it. i just liked the imagery... that's the only reason i didn't trash it. :) 


End file.
